Tuesday, July 8, 2008

...

Don’t you love me any more?
Can’t you give me another chance?
I swear… I will make you happy.
I will do anything for you.
Why do you look at me like that?
Please don’t look at me like that.
Stop. Please stop.
Don’t go.
Please don’t go.
Please…
I will do anything for you.
I will do anything you want.
Please don’t go.
Please give me one more chance.



Those were her last words to me. I wonder why I still remember them… why I remember those particular words. It’s the same way I remember everything else about that night. I remember the pink dress she was wearing, the way she kept wiping her palms on the sides of her dress… like she was trying to get a stain off. The way I couldn’t stop looking at her… I couldn’t stop even though I wanted to. The way she looked like she was about to cry, the way I felt like I was about to cry. I should have cried then I think… but it would have been meaningless. I would not have stayed even if I had cried. I could not have stayed even if she had cried.

There are days I think I forgot something about that night. And that keeps me up awake sometimes. Then I replay the whole scene in my mind… I replay her words… over and over again, trying to remember what I might have forgotten… till I drift to sleep, and dream about it all over again. I dream about her, her words, the pink dress and her hands. But I still wake up thinking maybe I forgot something, and that worries me.
I promised myself never to forget you see. I am afraid that I might forget what it all meant to me. I am afraid that I might forget why it was important that I did not forget.
But I am afraid I may have forgotten something, something important. And I am not sure what that is.

9 comments:

omohemi Benson said...

but doesn't forgetting,
help sometimes?

Unknown said...

@omohemi d agony of forgetting is dat lessons learnt would be repeated or worse yet d memory of joy is lost

La Reine said...

"But I am afraid I may have forgotten something, something important. And I am not sure what that is."

Man....

Thanks for the good luck wishes:)

Anonymous said...

hmmm

sleekiest said...

Very deep.. Sometimes certain events are so vividly ingrained on our subconscious, its scary.

miz-cynic said...

i love the way u write, pls write more often

Jennifer A. said...

Maybe you don't want to ever forget that you loved her...

babeandahalf said...

Dude, you need to shut down your blog. Two posts in a whole year??? Unacceptable!!!

Unknown said...

Haba! Lost, nearly 6 months and not 1 sentence?
Are u still on this earth!